coming out of the cupboard, and learning about the virus and lockdown

out of the cupboard

12th April 2020

Feels like spring. Probably time to get up.

Or down. It’s a long way down from this cupboard.

There’s a trick to getting down.

My granny taught me what to think about, when a situation is making you feel tense:

Neck – release, head – forward and up, back – lengthen and widen. Then JUMP.

Ouch. Some people think that teddies don’t feel pain. They’re wrong.

(Doesn’t anyone ever clean round here?)

Let’s see what the date is.

No!  It can’t be April! I never sleep that late!

Anything could have happened while I’ve been in the cupboard!

I’ll see what’s come in the post.

This letter looks important. It’s from the Government.

But come to think of it, I’m hungry.

I’ll find something to eat, and I’ll open that letter later on . . .

what’s been going on?

14th April 2020

So many things to get done when you’ve just come out of the cupboard.

There’s cleaning to do.

And the clocks have stopped.

(I’ll need a ladder for the kitchen clock – I’ll wind that later.)

Better see what food I’ve got, and make a shopping list.

Ooh, Alicia left lots of tasty things in the cupboard when she went back home! I must remember to thank her.

I won’t need to go shopping today.

I can climb up to wind the cuckoo clock.

Oh dear, it gets harder every year.

I’ll rest at the top, and have a chat with the big cuckoo.

The little cuckoo keeps itself to itself.

At least the electric clocks are still going.

I still can’t believe it’s April! Have I missed Easter?

I think I’d better phone Ruffy. He always knows what’s what.

That’s my friend Ruffy. I have a picture of him on my desk.

I know – I’ll ask him round for a cup of tea and a good catch-up.

I’ll get out the best cups.

And a clean table-cloth. Maybe put on a necklace.

One biscuit left in the packet.

Nice and soft, I’ll break it into toothsome morsels.

I’m looking forward to having a tea party!

It’s always good to talk to Ruffy.

After tea, we can go for a walk. Lovely!

ring ring — ring ring — ring ring — ring ring

Well, he’s in a funny mood.

Better look at that letter. Where did I put it?

I did read the letter.

and then I phoned Ruffy again.

He told me all about the coronavirus.

He says it’s even worse than the letter said.

Because I’m old, and because I have underlying health conditions, I’m extra Vulnerable.

So I can’t go out at all.

Can’t see my friends.

Can’t go to the shops.

Can’t go to the park.

I just have to stay at home.

I suppose I may as well have some of that biscuit.

Ruffy’s latest idea

16th April 2020

First he tells me to stay inside, now he says I have to go out and blow a whistle! Or clap, but we’re not really equipped for clapping.

He says it happens every Thursday, at eight o’clock.

I’ve dug out all my whistles.

The police whistle is loud, but people might take me for a policeperson.

I’ll try them all.

I think the postal workers’ one is best. Loud, bright, and principled.

Now I’m all ready for eight o’clock.

Ruffy says everyone will be outside, clapping and whistling and tooting.

I know my eyes aren’t great, but it looks very quiet out there.

I don’t hear any clapping or whistling.

I suppose I missed it. Oh well, there’s always next week.

all the news

18th April 2020

I’ve been thinking about that letter from the Government.

Not so much about the virus, but the name at the end.

I’ve read that name over and over again. It couldn’t be a funny way of writing “Jeremy”, could it? Probably not.

I went into the cupboard before the election, so I didn’t know.

I wonder what else has happened while I’ve been in the cupboard.

I don’t feel like phoning Ruffy again, he’s in a bossy mood.

Bimbo and Points aren’t answering. I’d better phone Lopsy.

Lopsy’s a floppy tiger I know.

You’d have to meet her to understand the extent of her floppiness.

So I heard a lot about Christmas.

Not a lot about the election. Lopsy’s a bit too scatterbrained for politics.

She told me some shocking news about Ruffy.

He hadn’t mentioned it to me, but apparently he was washed. And not just a gentle wipe.

Where do you usually get washed? In the bathroom.

But see what’s next to that bucket?

A washing machine. Words fail me. Thank goodness no one has ever tried to wash me.

I hope Ruffy will open up to me about the experience. It must have been very traumatic.

Poor old Bimbo had a bone marrow transplant.

All the old kapok had to come out, and he was hoovered inside and out. (I just hope they gave him an anaesthetic.) Then he was filled up again with some modern fluffy stuff.

He’s looking a bit plumper than he used to. Maybe it’s the steroids.

And Yes-Yes went to Oxfam! She was the star of their Valentines display!

Of course it will have opened up new opportunities for her, but we’ll all miss her.

Not the brightest bulb in the box, but very good-natured. A big West Ham supporter.

So that’s what’s been happening while I was in the cupboard.

food shopping

21st April 2020

I’ve been reading about the virus.

I know I must keep away from people, and lick my paws often.

Now to work out how I’m going to manage on my own at home during Lockdown.

I’ve got enough food to live on, but it would be nice to have something fresh to eat.

Look, another letter has arrived!

That’s an extremely kind offer.

Do I know Strawberry at number twenty-nine?

The pink one. Oh yes, I’ve seen her around. A very small bear.

I think she was one of triplets. There was a blue one too, and a yellow one.

I’ll phone and ask her to get me just one or two things. Fruit and veg, and maybe a bit of cheese or an egg.

Well, if I don’t have to worry about getting food, I’ll have all the time in the world.

The day stretches endless! What shall I fill it up with?

health

21st April 2020

Strawberry did come round with the shopping.

She made two trips to the shop, and came back with her shopping trolley loaded with vegetables.

Fresh food at last!

Just as well, because Ruffy rang to ask about my health.

But it’s true, I am a bit thinner than I used to be. Maybe I’ll weigh myself.

I used to be four ounces exactly. But I don’t seem to be that heavy now.

There, that’s about right. What does that add up to?

One and a half ounces, and sixty grams. (I lost the one-ounce weight, so I use a spoon instead.)

I wouldn’t say that’s dangerously underweight, would you?

I’ve eaten the celery¹, but there’s nothing else I really fancy eating.

I’ll put chocolate biscuits on the shopping list.

I hope Ruffy won’t say they’re too unhealthy.

lockdown exercise

22nd April 2020

My friends are all on at me.

First Ruffy was nagging me about healthy eating, and then he had a word with Ted, and told him I wasn’t listening to him.

This is Teddy.

At least he’s not bossy like Ruffy.

Such a nice bear!

He lives with Lopsy.

Rather him than me, but they seem happy together.

Teddy says that healthy eating is all very well, but I have to get some exercise too.

I have thought about it.

I’ve decided it’s pathetic to have this clever gadget, and never use it.

So I got it out and plugged it in to charge.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to use it.

I’m probably too stiff to do yoga anyway.

But I might as well try.

modern technology and yoga

29th April 2020

I’ve got a yoga app on my tablet. It’s brilliant!

A very nice rabbit called Georgina shows you what to do.

I think that’s the Tree Pose.

I hope to build up to three seconds.

Of course I’m a bit creaky. I always am in the spring.

The Cat Pose is quite easy.

And the Camel Pose.

Also the Table Pose.

There’s peaceful music in the background, and Georgina is very encouraging.

I like the Easy Pose.

Georgina calls it Seated Meditation.

I find I get quite carried away, meditating about things.

I didn’t like the name of the Corpse Pose. I didn’t want to try it.

But I recommend it. It’s not difficult at all.

And then Georgina says “Well done!” as though she can see how hard I’ve been trying.

I told Teddy I’d got the app working.

Skype? Oh dear, another App.

What’s he on about?

I shall go and do some Seated Meditation.

learning to skype (naked)

30th April 2020

I’m getting good at this modern stuff.

I got another app on my tablet.

I’ll be able to see my friends when I talk to them.

Teddy’s not answering.

Who else can I try? Ruffy!

I told you he was bossy.

I’ll see what clothes I’ve got in my suitcase.