road safety and glue

5th September 2021

I must admit I felt relieved when Kimbleton left.

All the time they were staying with me, I felt obliged to be thinking of amusements for them.

It was very tiring.

But now that they’ve set out on a major expedition, I’m worrying, because I know they aren’t careful on roads.

When I told them that I always look right, look left, look right again, and then if all’s clear, quick march straight across, they laughed at me, and darted straight out into the traffic.

I didn’t dare mention road safety again, for fear of setting off even more dangerous behaviour.

But Ruffy reminded me that in many places there are now dedicated tardigrade lanes.

I’m hoping that Kimbleton will keep to those.

I wonder whether Kimbleton has made any progress in finding Walrus and Bruno.

All these months that they’ve been away, I’m ashamed to say that I’ve hardly given them a thought.

I was a bit cross with them for breaking the Covid Rules, and setting off during Lockdown.

But now I’m worried. Supposing they did actually catch the Virus?

Perhaps they’re ill somewhere, with no one knowing who they are or where they come from?

They may even be dead.

Perhaps we’ll never know what’s happened to them.

Jenny says it’s not my fault.

Jenny’s my little sister. She’s always been quite strict.

I’d only just put the phone down, when it rang again.

Oh dear. I’d forgotten all about the great Rebellion.

I wonder if I should have been glueing myself to something.

I don’t feel that anyone would notice if I did.

I’ll make some Rebellion biscuits.

I’ll go and push a little packet of them through Ruffy and Points’s cell window.

I don’t suppose you get very nice food in a police cell. If you get any at all.

If I sing Gibbs’s song while I’m rolling out the dough, it will almost count as practising.

“Oh! my Ruffy, my constant Ruffy,
When shall we see our Ruffy again?
Ruffy again, Ruffy again, Ruffy again, Ruffy again…

Oh! my Ruffy, and also Points,
When shall we see them both again?”

Oh dear. I’ve made too many, and they’ve come out far too big.

They won’t be easy to smuggle into anywhere.

delivering biscuits

14th September 2021

My friends Ruffy and Points were arrested on a demonstration.

They’d glued themselves to the pavement, in protest against investment in fossil fuels.

The police took them away still stuck to the paving stone.

I’m worried that they may be anxious and hungry, so I packed up some biscuits and took them down to the Police Station.

There were several Police Officers at the front desk.

At first they pretended not to notice me, although I’d seen them looking at me, and laughing to each other.

It can be hard for a small furry person, trying to engage with the world of Law and Order.

I felt proud of knowing his height. It had been discussed when he was borrowing some clothes from my sister Jenny.

Oh dear oh dear.

I think the officer was teasing me by asking all those questions, and then talking about puddings.

I hope I haven’t let out things that Ruffy and Points would prefer to have kept to themselves.

I’m sure these are perfectly nice Police Officers.

The problem is that they’re used to thinking of furry people as less than human.

Of course it’s all right to laugh at a Thing. They didn’t realise that I am not a Thing.

I was nearly crying.

But as I was leaving, the Officer must have taken pity on me.

I hurried out after the other Officer and saw her get into a police van.

I ran and jumped on to the van’s back bumper. There wasn’t much to cling on to.

Luckily I did some hitch-hiking in my younger days, so I know the trick of staying on a bumper.

You have to relax, lean into the van, and go with the bumps.

It started to rain, which made everything rather slippery. I nearly fell off several times.

At last we came through some very secure gates, and the van stopped.

I noted that the gap under the gates was big enough to allow me back out once I’d accomplished my mission.

Now my task was to discover where Ruffy and Points were being held.

I realised I’d been acting rather impulsively.

I didn’t know how I was going to find them, or what I should do when I did find them.

I’ve never been to a prison before. This is quite a large one.

After my experience at the Police Station, I felt cautious about taking the official route.

Instead I wandered round, peering in through several of the windows.

It’s nice that the prison has a Games Room. Ruffy and Points can enjoy playing ping-pong or Ludo with the other prisoners.

Or perhaps not ping-pong if they’re still attached to the paving stone.

But I didn’t seem to be able to find the right window.

I couldn’t see anyone inside who might tell me where Points and Ruffy were.

Eventually I plucked up courage to knock on one of the doors.

I braced myself for another difficult conversation.

But the door was opened so quickly that I was taken by surprise, and couldn’t say anything at all.

I put down my parcel of biscuits and ran.

I hope the Prison Officers read the label on the parcel and will give it to Ruffy and Points.

After that, I made my way home.

It was a long walk.

I had intended to take some of the biscuits round to little Strawberry.

She’s always very helpful, and generous with the vegetables that she grows in her garden.

But after I got home from the prison I didn’t have the energy for any more outings.

I did notice that the cuckoos were rather excited.

I couldn’t understand what they were trying to tell me.

Perhaps it’s time for them to set off on their annual journey to warmer climes.

In May they sing all day, in June they change their tune, in July away they fly, and it’s already September.

After a nap I’ll climb up and see if communication is easier at closer quarters.

No good worrying about it now. I can’t keep my eyes open.

masks, blackberries

27th September 2021

I believe the cuckoos have something they want to tell me.

When I climbed up to speak to them, they kept pointing their beaks upwards.

I looked all round the ceiling, but I couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary. Just the usual cobwebs.

I’ll keep an eye on things up there.

I must remember to keep on trying to talk to the cuckoos, in case they have anything else to tell me.

I took a parcel of Rebellion biscuits round to little Strawberry.

I’ve visited her once before, early this summer. We had a cup of apple-blossom tea in her garden.

This time she invited me into her house. Very cosy.

She urged me to take off my mask.

I’ve hardly been indoors anywhere, so I don’t know what’s normal when socialising.

Strawberry’s house is not well ventilated. It hardly has any windows, and they don’t look as though they would open.

Since I was the person coming into Strawberry’s home, possibly bringing alien infections with me, should I keep my mask on?

But could that seem rude? Perhaps suggesting that she wasn’t being sufficiently careful?

This is when I need Ruffy’s advice. He’s always read the latest research and statistics, and knows what should be done in any situation.

But with him and Points locked up in prison, I’ll have to make my own decisions.

The Government isn’t giving advice either. It just says that I should use my judgement. That’s not very helpful at all.

If Strawberry’s undecided about wearing a mask, I don’t want to influence her in the wrong direction.

We old bears should set a good example to the youngsters.

But I don’t like to think that she may think that I think that she’s likely to infect me.

On the other hand, if I take my mask off, it may seem that I’m not concerned for her well-being.

Or that I’m not really worried about my own vulnerability. Which I am.

Since I am worried, I should probably keep my mask on.

But then I don’t want to offend Strawberry.

I shouldn’t have come inside at all. There was no need. We could have chatted on the doorstep.

I’d better leave.

I haven’t given Strawberry the biscuits, in case she felt obliged to share them with me.

I’ve left the package by her sofa. I hope she finds it.

I was relieved to be back outside in the fresh air.

Next I took some biscuits round to my friend Ellie.

This time I didn’t make the mistake of accepting her invitation to come inside.

Ellie told me where to find a good patch of brambles. I was feeling energetic, and quite hungry, so I set off straight away.

It’s a long time since I’ve been blackberrying.

I discovered that over-seventy-fives are also unreliable at berry discrimination, but please don’t tell Ellie.

It was obvious that the green berries weren’t ripe. I know that lots of fruit start off green, and then turn red. Plums, cherries, apples…

So I picked rather too many red blackberries before I began to think about their name.

I realised that there’s a reason why they’re known as black berries.

Luckily I then came on a different bush which brought it all back. The blacker ones tasted very good indeed.

It was a prickly job.

The brambles themselves, of course, have sharp thorns which I didn’t quite manage to avoid.

And I thought I’d also been attacked, perhaps in a friendly way, by a gang of very small hedgehogs.

I expect it was because I’d been thinking a lot about my friend Points, who happens to be a hedgehog.

But these prickly creatures ignored my requests for them to move.

I soon realised that they were quite inanimate.

Instead of prickles, they had little claws, and when I pulled them off they took tufts of my fur with them.

I don’t think any hedgehog would have behaved like that.

Now I’ve got a lot of blackberries.

Tomorrow I’ll make a blackberry and apple pie, or possibly a crumble, to take to Points and Ruffy in prison.

No, that’s not a good idea.

The Prison Officers would suspect that I was smuggling a file or a cosh into the prison, hidden under the pastry.

I suppose blackberry wine wouldn’t be allowed either.

Perhaps bramble jelly, in a plastic container. I see that glass wouldn’t be welcome. (I’m afraid I’m starting to think like a Prison Officer.)

Blackberry buns or muffins could surely only be used as the friendliest sort of weapon.

I’ll see if I can find a recipe.