dreams and music

2nd June 2020

I did not have a good night.

I couldn’t stop thinking about Bimbo.

I know Ruffy said that the consultant was optimistic, but that just means they’re hoping Bimbo will get better.

It doesn’t mean that he definitely will get better.

When I did get to sleep, I had nightmares.

First just the ordinary sort of nightmares about missing trains

and being naked in the middle of the House of Commons with the Prime Minister saying that science isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

(I don’t know much about science, but I know that the more it’s cracked up, the better.)

Then I woke up in a sweat from a nightmare about scissors.

It seemed very real, even after I woke up.

I knew it was really Bimbo I was worrying about.

I made myself think about beautiful winged elephants chasing all my worries away

(it was Jean de Brunhoff who gave me that good idea) and I did get back to sleep in the end.

I got up determined to make good use of the day.

I phoned the hospital.

I’m glad they’re pleased with his progress.

I chose my book for the Book Club.

I chose it quite quickly, once I’d put my mind to it.

It’s The Bike Lesson.

It’s useful for reminding old people that they’re not always cleverer than young people.

I’m going to tidy all these books away on to the Book Club page. That will make a bit of space.

I resolved to seriously clear out my box.

I have too many possessions.

Jenny says you must only keep things that spark joy.

But that’s no help. They ALL spark joy.

Look at this!

Doesn’t that spark joy in you?

I love rainbows.

It’s only glass, and it’s not useful.

I’ll get rid of everything that I’m not likely to use in the next two years.

It’s no good waiting till the charity shops open again.

Anyway, most of my things are too worn out to be any use to anyone else.

(I’ve been forgetting about the badges while I was worrying about Bimbo. But I shall be using them all in the next two years. I’m not actually a grandfather, but I like this one.)

Today I shall be ruthless.

I’m throwing out hundreds of things. Into the bin with them.

There, that feels better.

I think.

It’s bin day tomorrow.

Now I have to work out a nice surprise for Bimbo when he comes out of hospital.

I’ve had a sort of idea.

I’ll ask Lopsy what she thinks about it.

Now I’m almost hoping that Bimbo won’t get out of hospital too soon, so we have time to get really good before he gets home.

I shall practise hard on my triangle.

I wonder if I can find a way to stop it twirling round?

bin day

6th June 2020

I’ve slept late this morning.

No nightmares last night.

So, what does the day hold?

It’s bin day.

That’s all right. I put the bin out last night.

It’s completely full, because I was ruthless yesterday.

I cleared hundreds of things out of my box, and threw them all away.

But hang on a minute.

That key that I threw out.

I thought, if it doesn’t unlock anything, there’s no point in keeping it.

I tried it in all the doors, and it didn’t lock them, or unlock them.

So I threw it in the bin.

But what if it’s not the locking kind of key. What if it WINDS something?

Quick quick, get everything out before the Refuse Collection Operatives arrive.

Just in the nick of time!

The key was right at the bottom.

This jumper has gone funny because I washed it too hot.

But it’s still quite cosy, and it reminds me of being at school with my friends.

That isn’t a real umbrella, and it’s broken, so I threw it out because it will never be any use for anything.

But there are two amazing things about it. And I could try to glue it back together.

I could mend this angel, too.

I’ll put aside the things that can be mended. It’s just lazy to throw them out.

Now I don’t need to put the bin out, because there’s nothing in it.

That’s saved me a job.

Just as well I got to the bin before the Refuse people did.

I was in such a rush to find the key, that I didn’t do my early-morning yoga.

Now I’m all stiff.

I wrote to Georgina the yoga rabbit about the Warrior Pose.

I explained that I’m a pacifist.

Georgina wrote back and said I should think of being an ECO warrior, like Greta Thunberg.

Eco warriors have to be strong, to fight against pollution and destruction of the environment, and also bendy, to adapt to the new green way of life.

That’s reasonable.

Better get dressed now, and phone the hospital.

But first I’ll tell you why Ruffy hasn’t been reporting on Bimbo’s condition.

He and Points went to Hyde Park for the big protest on Wednesday.

They hitched there. A kind lorry driver gave them a lift.

The demo was bigger than they’d expected.

In all the jostle, Ruffy dropped his phone and couldn’t find it again.

They marched to Parliament Square.

It was very crowded, and Ruffy and Points got split up.

They were searching for each other till nearly everyone had left.

By then it was too late to hitch home, so they slept by the statue of Nelson Mandela.

We’re all proud that they went to protest. I wish I could have gone.

I hope they haven’t caught the virus.

They did wear masks, but they couldn’t avoid being close to people.

So that’s why Ruffy hasn’t been phoning the hospital.

I’ve phoned now, and here’s some good news.

Bimbo is well enough to go home today. I wasn’t expecting that.

They’d been worrying because his skin is so grey, and his arms are blue.

They hadn’t realised that that’s normal for Bimbo.

He’s managing fine without extra oxygen.

So Patient Transport will take him home.

I asked, can’t his friends go round and help cook meals and things?

But the nurse said no, he’ll do fine on his own.

I hope she’s right.

I’ll make him some welcome-home bunting, and ask Ruffy to take it round when he drops off Bimbo’s shopping.

I need to work hard on improving my triangulation, because we must get that Zoom Ensemble together soon.

That will really cheer Bimbo up.

I’m working on my pure silvery tone.

I’m helping to organise the Ensemble.

I’m not very musical, but I’m tidying all the instruments on to one neat page, which I feel is helpful.

Now I’ll check on the bean.

No change. But I’m cautiously optimistic.

Then I’d better try that key out on some windable things.

It’s sure to fit something.

I’m glad I didn’t throw it out.

And I’m very very glad that Bimbo is better.

chips, politics, and testing the key

9th June 2020

Bimbo’s home from hospital.

Ruffy got some healthy shopping for him.

Later Bimbo texted saying “Thanks for the shopping. Please bring chips and chilli sauce”.

So Ruffy did.

He was worried that it wasn’t very healthy food for a convalescent.

But he learned from a real doctor that the chips will give Bimbo vitamin C and necessary carbs, so then he felt all right about it.

Points phoned.

I said it was very nice of her to go on the demo last week.

She showed me some pictures by Mona Chalabi about the chances of getting arrested if you’re black, or if you’re white.

Oh gosh.

I’ll start with the easy bit.

I do have money.

I’ll send some to the Stephen Lawrence Trust.

Or should I send it to the Red Card?

Or maybe the bail fund?

I’d better see what petitions I should be signing.

Does it really make a difference signing a petition? It’s only one name.

But if everyone thought that, I suppose nothing would happen at all.

At least they don’t know how small and insignificant I am.

My name is as good as anyone else’s.

Oh dear. When everyone else is working hard to make things fair, I feel I should be working hard too.

But I’m retired. Nobody wants my special skills any more.

I’ll work a bit more on my silvery tone.

We’re keeping it a secret from Bimbo that we’re all practising our instruments.

We’ll surprise him when we’ve perfected our technique.

I think my tone is getting a bit purer and more silvery.

Now I’m going to find what that key is for.

Politics is the most important thing in the world, but you can’t think about it all the time. At least, I can’t.

Here’s something that needs winding up.

But it doesn’t need exactly this key.

What can it be for?

Ah, I think I heard the postperson!

Postcards! And a letter!

I’ll make a cup of tea, and then I’ll put on my special gloves and have a look at the post.

catching up with everything

12th June 2020

Today I’m going to get everything done.

All those things that I keep meaning to do.

Such as…

I’ve been forgetting about my bean!

I’d better go and check on it.

I hope it hasn’t died of neglect.

No, something is happening.

A sort of loop is growing.

I hope it hasn’t gone wrong.

I’ll get dressed, and then I’ll get it some water.

Reindeer said I must keep watering it.

Now I must ring Bimbo and see how he’s getting on.

I hope they didn’t send him home from hospital too soon.

I’ll ring the others to let them know he’s doing all right.

I had lots of mail.

I’ve decided to put all my postcards on the fridge.

I attach them with little cubic magnets.

That leafy picture was from Bunce and Snowy a week or so ago.

Oh, that reminds me of another phone call I have to make.

I heard that Monkey’s new Fruit Kebab Van business packed up when the lockdown started.

I thought he might like to go down to Outermost Wessex to help Bunce and Snowy with picking their soft fruit. I’ll ring him in a minute.

My cousin Peter sent the postcard with the penguins on it. It’s nice, isn’t it?

Walrus sent me a postcard from Guernsey.

I’m puzzled. I didn’t know he’d gone to Guernsey.

He sent a picture of him and Bruno having a tea party with my stripy biscuits.

But are they at home, or are they in Guernsey?

I thought no one was allowed to travel at the moment?

Walrus seems a very nice chap. I hope I’ll get to know him and Bruno better when the virus is over.

Catherine sent me an exciting picture of a shark diving into a house.

She wrote a lot on the back, in quite small writing, so I’ll tell you what it says.

The best thing is that Bimbo is sure to be fine, because he’s a bugler.

She says that brass players always have strong lungs.

That makes sense.

I expect triangle players have strong arms. But that won’t help with the virus.

Here’s a picture of Bimbo before he was ill.

He can play every kind of bugle call.

I hope he’ll be better soon.

Catherine has sent me some orange jelly for my jelly pocket. That’s very kind!

And she sent some suggestions for Ellie’s Book Club.

I think the next Book Club meeting is quite soon.

And the Red and Green Teddies are having their meeting any day now.

Oh oh oh, the Book Club is tonight.

I’d better put on my book badge.

I told Ellie I’d nearly made a page for all the books about bears.

So I’d better do that.

Just as well I’ve already chosen my book.

I don’t know what happens at a Book Club.

I suppose I tell them why I like the book that I’ve chosen.

And then I expect we have to listen to everyone else.

I’d better find the App that we need for the Book Club meeting.

My tablet will be chockablock with Apps.

I must get some tidying done.

Of course it was right not to throw out all these perfectly good things.

But now there’s more to tidy up than ever.

Oh dear, I’m not sure that that really was tidying. I’m getting tired.

But I’d better find what that key is for, once and for all.

Well, it’s not for this, anyway.

I’ve signed up some more people for the Zoom Ensemble.

My cousins from the deep South are playing very exotic instruments.

Lopsy has got in touch with some of the other choristers from the choir she used to sing in long ago.

I’ve put all the recordings on the Zoom Ensemble page. So I have done some tidying up.

Didcot can’t start practising till he’s found all the parts of his flootatoota.

He’s got most of them, but not the one that’s crucial for making a noise.

I’d better practise my triangle now.

I must improve my pure silvery tone.

I’m quite pleased with the silveriness . But I’m too tired to work on the purity right now.

Surely that’s enough for one day?

doing one thing really thoroughly

16th June 2020

The Book Club wasn’t so bad.

We used a clever App.

I could see all the other people in little windows on the screen.

At first Ellie was in the main window, and then when someone else spoke, they took centre stage.

Including me, when I introduced my book.

The only awkward thing was that Ellie had reminded me that I’d be on camera, so I’d put on a shirt and tie.

But I hadn’t realised that my surroundings would also be visible.

Everyone else had bookshelves or smart furniture or lovely gardens behind them.

I’m sorry to say that I had got comfortable on a pile of sheets and clothes and things.

I hope everyone was so interested in what I was saying about “The Bike Lesson” that they won’t have noticed the background.

All the books sounded interesting.

I decided to do a lot more reading from now on.

The topic for the next meeting is lighthouses.

It was Gibbs’s idea.

Ellie said that “Tim to the Lighthouse” shows a narrow, stereotyped, image of the girl character.

Gibbs pointed out that it shows quite a poor image of humans altogether, trying to wreck each other’s boats, and sorting out problems by fighting, and he said can’t we just enjoy the good points of the book, while bearing its imperfections in mind.

I have a book about lighthouses, which I’ve never read because it’s so big.

I don’t think there’s any fighting in it, but there may be some disasters.

I’ll get it out and make a start on it.

But not today.

Today I’ve decided that I won’t try to get a whole long list of things done.

I’ll just choose one task, and by the end of the day I shall have done it.

Of course there are some little things that have to be done every day.

I must check on the bean.

That looks like progress! It seems to have recovered from its loop.

I’ll do my yoga, to get limbered up for the task ahead, and I’m not going to give up eating.

Apart from that, it’s just the one thing.

Teddy made me realise that I need to have more Activities.

He’s practising his spoonophone, and making bread, and doing matchstick modelling, and learning French on an App.

(You can hear his spoonophone on the Zoom Ensemble page.

But I’m afraid you can’t try the bread, and he says he hasn’t got very far with the matchsticks yet. It’s difficult because no one uses matches much these days.)

He said I have to give my brain some exercise.

So today is my day for deciding.

I’ll put on my superpower t-shirt. And a foreign-language badge.

First I’ll get the App that Teddy told me about.

I’ve decided to learn Swiss, so that I can talk to the cuckoos in the cuckoo clock.

My great grandfather brought them and the clock over from Switzerland in the fifties.

We’ve often had a chat when I wind the clock in the spring, but not with actual words.

They still don’t speak any English. And I don’t speak any Swiss.

Perhaps I haven’t been making enough of an effort to get to know them.

But I can’t find Swiss in the list of languages on the App.

I’ll ring Teddy.

Oh. Lopsy’s answered the phone.

I’d forgotten that it was Lopsy’s turn to phone Bimbo.

We agreed to take turns, so that he wouldn’t have to keep answering the phone.

I called out to the cuckoos, in French, and German, and Italian, and Romansh.

But they didn’t answer.

So perhaps they don’t speak any of those languages.

What can I do to show them I’m glad that they’re here?

I’ll make them something nice to eat.

It needs to be either from their culture, or typically British.

I don’t have any Swiss cheese.

I’ll make scones.

But scones need Cornish Clotted Cream. I haven’t got any of that.

And the cuckoos may be vegan anyway.

I’ll use mashed potatoes instead. That’s very British.

It will be just as good as cream.

Luckily I do have potatoes.

Better be careful with this sharp scraper.

Lots of marge, plenty of salt.

This is going to be good.

Now for the scones themselves.

A good squidgey dough. It looks like more mashed potatoes, but it’s not.

While the scones are cooking, I’ll look for the jam.

Bunce and Snowy made some strawberry jam last summer.

That will be perfect.

I never know which goes on first, the cream or the jam.

I’ll try both ways.

And should they be open, or sandwiched together?

The small cuckoo has quite a tiny beak, so I’ll leave them in halves.

Now to get cleaned up, and take the scones up to the cuckoos.

I’ve found a handy way to carry the plate,

but I don’t think I can climb up the chains with it.

Better build a tower.

I’ve never tried to carry anything up here before.

I hope they like the scones.

Well, they liked them slightly.

I think they understood that I was trying to be friendly.

But I’ve thought of another way to communicate with them.

I have a cuckoo whistle.

Today I’ll practise on that, instead of on the triangle.

I’m aiming for a gentle woody tone.

Now we can have a conversation.

But that doesn’t settle the question of what language I’m going to learn.

So unfortunately I haven’t quite achieved even one thing today.

communication, adventure

21st June 2020

It’s been raining.

I’m tired of being indoors all the time.

But I’ll get on with my indoor things.

The bean doesn’t seem to mind being indoors.

It’s growing faster than me.

I’ll phone Ruffy. Today is his day for checking on poor Bimbo.

Ruffy’s very kind.

But I want to wander around and see what’s on the shelves.

I don’t have any ideas when I sit at home trying to make a shopping list.

And I want to pick the best carrrot, and the best bread roll.

Oh well, all things come to those who wait. Most things. Many things.

I’d better finish off yesterday’s task.

I intend to learn a new language, and I have to choose which one.

I did want to be able to talk to the cuckoos.

I didn’t get very far with that.

But I shall try to be more friendly with them than before.

Today I’m going to play a piece of cuckoo music on my triangle.

It’s by Nina Batschinskaja.

Of course I can only play the triangle line.

We’re all practising our instruments in secret.

It’s going to be a surprise for Bimbo.

Before he got ill, he was starting to plan a Zoom Ensemble.

By the time he’s better, we’ll all be perfect at our parts.

Ellie is organising the children at the nursery where she works.

She hopes to get them more coordinated before the Ensemble is all put together.

And on the big day, her colleague will take the babies into a different room so that they don’t squeak in the quiet parts.

Ellies says they’re all enjoying it very much.

But I wonder if it’s right to keep it all a secret.

Perhaps we should tell Bimbo about it, because this is the exciting part of the Ensemble, when everyone is getting ready.

Ruffy says Bimbo’s bored, and I think it’s a shame he’s missing the fun of telling us what to do.

I’ll consult the others.

But to get back to the question of a new language.

Rufffy says that cuckoos are migratory birds.

I’d forgotten about the stork.

That’s rather rude of me.

Yes, there he is.

I think he’s more mobile than the cuckoos.

I’ll get the globe.

He can show me which part of the world he comes from.

We’re communicating!

The stork told me very clearly that he comes from Mali.

I’ll get my tablet.

I’ll show him all the languages I could learn on the App.

There isn’t one called Malian, but perhaps Mali is a country like Switzerland, with lots of different languages.

He can show me which one I should learn to talk to him.

No luck.

I wish I’d kept the rest of the scones.

I was so depressed at failing to communicate with the cuckoos, that I ate up all the leftovers myself.

Never mind, I’ll prepare him an attractive platter of tasty and nourishing foods.

He definitely liked that. He ate heartily.

And now he’s gone back up to his hook.

Communication is hard work.

I have an idea for some indoor excitement.

I’ve been sensible ever since I came out of the cupboard in April.

Life has been dull. Humdrum.

I know it’s not just me. It’s quite as bad for many people.

And some are even more restricted than me.

My friend in the Forest of Dean is in total lockdown in a sterile cubicle, because of being at specially serious risk.

He’s keeping his spirits up. He says he’s in Clockdown.

My young friends and neighbours have been doing their very best to keep me busy and amused.

But today I feel a need for excitement.

I can’t go out to a theme park, so I shall set up an exciting ride right here.

I’ve got out the slinky.

It is a long way down. There’s a lot of steps.

But nothing ventured, nothing gained.

This certainly is exciting.

Perhaps not very sensible for a vulnerable elderly bear with underlying conditions.

But a not-to-be-forgotten experience.

I’ll take some arnica now, and have a little lie down.

an easy day

26th June 2020

My adventurous ride down the stairs took a lot out of me.

I’m not planning anything special today.

I’ll leave worrying about communication for another time.

Everything can wait. I’m going to relax.

But I’d better just check the bean.

I’ve been remembering to water it every day.

Oh my goodness. It keeps on growing.

I’ve formed a hypothesis about the leaves.

There are two big leaves at the bottom, and three middle-sized leaves half way up. (That’s not a good picture, but I assure you there are exactly three leaves.)

So I’m predicting that when the little leaves at the top open out, there’ll be four of them.

But I’m exercising rigorous scepticism, and shan’t be at all disconcerted if instead of four leaves I find it’s grown a dozen bananas.

That would be quite convenient actually.

I’ll ask Madame Cholet and Reindeer how tall it’s going to get.

I’m glad I have friends who know all about growing things.

I’m not sure how I’ll manage a big pot.

Or a big beanstalk, for that matter.

But sufficient unto the day is the difficultness thereof.

It’s Lopsy’s turn for phoning Bimbo today.

I’ll give her a ring and ask how Bimbo’s getting on.

It’s taking him a very long time to get over the Virus.

Lopsy is so energetic. Running AND laundry!

I probably should wash some of my clothes.

I haven’t washed anything since I came out of the cupboard.

It didn’t seem to matter much, seeing as I’m not meeting anyone.

But perhaps that’s a bit disgusting.

It does look like a good drying day, even indoors.

But I’ve just remembered that Shamus plays the fiddle.

I’d better phone him before I do anything else.

I’ll ask if he’d like to join the Zoom Ensemble.

Oh, and that reminds me that Didcot called to say that he’s found another section of his Flootatoota.

But he still hasn’t got the crucial piece that will let him actually play it.

Then I realised I never did phone Monkey, to see if he wanted to go and help Bunce and Snowy with their Soft Fruit harvest.

He’s not had any work since his fruit kebab van business went bust.

Now for the laundry.

I think I’ve got everything I need.

This sun’s so bright I can hardly see what I’m doing.

Nice cool water.

I wonder when these clothes were last washed. Lots of dirt is certainly coming out of them.

But that’s enough of that.

I’ll hang them up to dry.

Lopsy was quite right. They’ll be dry in a trice.

Now I think I really can sit back and take it easy.

I’ll get some clothes on.

It’s lucky that jeans don’t ever need washing, so they’re still dry.

I’ll find a nice relaxing badge.

I’m going to read some of my lighthouse books, ready for the next Book Club.

I’m half way through several of them.

I like books that are exciting without the characters being horrible to each other.

There are terrible natural disasters in “The Red Rocks of Eddystone”.

It’s interesting to read how the ingenious and heroic builders pitted their wits and strength against the forces of nature.

The excitement in “We Didn’t Mean to Go to Sea” comes from natural hazards and human error.

The book certainly shows the usefulness of lighthouses.

I haven’t got very far yet with the next book.

It’s quite slow.

I’m told the characters take ten years to get to the lighthouse.

That should be a nice peaceful read.

a tough challenge, but also Christmas

30th June 2020

I meant to have an easy day yesterday.

But there are always things that have to get done.

How did I manage before I retired? There’s never time to fit everything in.

I have a major task facing me today.

My bean is getting too big for the little pot that I planted it in.

Madame Cholet and Reindeer have kindly brought round an enormous flower pot.

Also a bag of earth, and a stick for the bean to climb up.

I must put the earth in the pot, and the stick in the earth.

I’ll certainly need my superpower t-shirt today.

Luckily I have a gardening badge I can wear.

But I suppose I should say hello to the cuckoos first.

I’m using music to communicate with them.

Today I’m going to play them Beethoven’s sixth symphony on my triangle.

There’s a cuckoo in the second movement.

In my head, it sounds like this.

Of course if the cuckoos don’t know the piece quite well, they may not recognise the triangle line. But I hope they do.

It’s a long symphony.

Beethoven expects a lot from his triangle players.

It’s difficult to make a note carry on for four whole bars.

I’m worn out now.

I’d better have a cup of tea before I think about re-potting the bean.

First I need to move the earth and the flower pot away from the front door.

It’s going to be hard, without anyone to help, but it’s dogged as does it.

Then I’ll have to get the earth into the flower pot.

I’m not sure how to do that.

I’ll mull over the problem, while I do some tidying.

I haven’t made much progress with sorting my box lately.

But now I think I really have taken a step forward.

I’ve found a box for the thimbles, and a box for the necklaces.

This thimble says “EAT BERMALINE BREAD”. That’s something I haven’t done for a long time.

And now I’ve had an idea about moving the earth.

I see that what I need to do is set up a pulley system.

But what can I use as a bucket to hold the earth?

A tea-cup is too fragile. A box wouldn’t hang straight.

It needs something that I can attach the cable to in several places.

I’ll have a look in the kitchen.

The very thing.

Modern Christmas puddings come in little plastic buckets.

First I’ll have to eat the pudding.

I missed the real Christmas, because I was in the cupboard in December.

So I’ll have a summer Christmas instead.

Lopsy’s the expert on Christmas. I’ll give her a ring and ask her advice on how it works.

Well, this isn’t what I was expecting to be doing, when I got up this morning.

Let’s see if I have the ingredients for a good Christmas.

Yes, I found the tree.

I’ve put it under the cuckoo clock, because the cuckoos may have missed Christmas too, if they were busy migrating.

I’ve hung paper chains on the cuckoo clock’s chains.

There’s a present under the tree.

I don’t know what it is.

I shut my eyes, and pulled something out of my box, and wrapped it up as a surprise.

Now for the pudding.

Lopsy’s right. The mouthwash does have alcohol in it.

It will add a cool fresh peppermint flavour to the pudding.

No, the mouthwash seems to be too wet. It won’t burn at all.

What about hand gel? That’s definitely got alcohol in it.

I hope it will make a beautiful blue flame, like brandy does.

Oh. It did burn very well, but with an invisible flame.

When I held my paw over it to check whether it was burning, it burned my paw.

But the pudding is delicious.

Now we’d better open the present. I wonder what it will be?

I hope it’s something that’s easy to share.

The cuckoos don’t seem very interested, but the stork has been waiting to find out what’s inside.

Well, that’s lucky.

It felt quite a boring shape, but the contents are perfect.

A bar of chocolate.

Twelve little rectangles, three for each of us.

The stork flew up with six pieces for the cuckoos, and now he’s taken his share up to his hook.

It was good chocolate.

I think I can now face the difficult task.

The Christmas pudding bucket is just right.

This is working very well indeed.

The bean will soon be in its new home.

And I hope that I’ll soon be in bed.

It’s been a long hard day.

Though of course quite merry.